1. The rules for talking to a guy
These rules are going out the window right now. Just last week a friend of mine told me that I "look thirsty when I message a guy first". Um what? So I'm just supposed to sit around waiting to see if he would like to talk to me? No. I don't like that at all. If I want to talk to you then I'm sure as hell going to do it. And if you don't want to respond then that's totally fine and I won't bother you again with my friendship. But at least I can say I tried. I create my own rules when it comes to talking to people and you should too.
2. Judging drink orders
Stop laughing at what I like to drink. I don't care if you think Smirnoff ice isn't a real drink. It is delicious!! I will sit at the bar and order a cider without your sense of judgement. Congratulations that you like beer that tastes like mud. I think it's gross but I won't say anything about it while you make comments about my "piss water". I don't tell you what to order at Starbucks so don't tell me what to drink at a party.
Stop laughing at what I like to drink. I don't care if you think Smirnoff ice isn't a real drink. It is delicious!! I will sit at the bar and order a cider without your sense of judgement. Congratulations that you like beer that tastes like mud. I think it's gross but I won't say anything about it while you make comments about my "piss water". I don't tell you what to order at Starbucks so don't tell me what to drink at a party.
3. What I should be wearing
I once dated a guy who told me my shorts were too short. He actually told me I needed to change my clothes. Now I would understand his judgement if we were having dinner with his parents or going somewhere fancy (the fanciest we got was olive garden...) but we we're going to somewhere silly like the science center. I like to consider myself a classy person! My shirts are never too low cut and my butt cheeks are never hanging out. My mom raised me right. I wear clothes that I like! I have been blessed with the metabolism of a 12 year old boy and I am proud of my body. I'll wear what I want, okay?
I once dated a guy who told me my shorts were too short. He actually told me I needed to change my clothes. Now I would understand his judgement if we were having dinner with his parents or going somewhere fancy (the fanciest we got was olive garden...) but we we're going to somewhere silly like the science center. I like to consider myself a classy person! My shirts are never too low cut and my butt cheeks are never hanging out. My mom raised me right. I wear clothes that I like! I have been blessed with the metabolism of a 12 year old boy and I am proud of my body. I'll wear what I want, okay?
4. Dieting
I don't care about your diet. I don't care that you're at 24 hour fitness. I don't care about your new juicing recipe. Just like I'm sure you don't care that I love to eat hot cheetos and wash it down with a diet coke. Stop feeling the need to prove to everyone that you're dieting and working out nonstop. If you are changing your lifestyle for YOURSELF then that is amazing and I am happy to see your results! But stop doing it for the wrong reasons. And stop rolling your eyes at me when I ask for extra sauce at in-n-out...
I don't care about your diet. I don't care that you're at 24 hour fitness. I don't care about your new juicing recipe. Just like I'm sure you don't care that I love to eat hot cheetos and wash it down with a diet coke. Stop feeling the need to prove to everyone that you're dieting and working out nonstop. If you are changing your lifestyle for YOURSELF then that is amazing and I am happy to see your results! But stop doing it for the wrong reasons. And stop rolling your eyes at me when I ask for extra sauce at in-n-out...
5. Selfies
"Oh my god all she does is post selfies" is such a stupid thing my generation complains about. So what if Sally posts pictures of herself? I post selfies on my Instagram because that morning I was just really feeling great about myself. I don't post them for likes or to receive compliments. I do it because I look at my phone and think "wow I look very nice today' and that makes me feel good! So girls out there, you post as many selfies as you like! And if someone doesn't like it then the unfollow button is really easy to find.
6. Makeup
It's shocking to me how many comments about girls wearing make up I find men posting on Facebook. We are either fake because we wear too much, or some of my male "friends" have commented on how ugly girls can look underneath the make up. Because of this girls are posting pictures with captions screaming "look at me I'm brave enough to not wear make up online!!!!". I have pictures on my Instagram without make up on, but you all probably don't know that because it really isn't that big of a deal. I wear make up because I like to. I like how when I spend some time on it I can sort of almost look my age. So if you like wearing a ton of make up then go for it!!! And if you don't even want to consider the idea of putting a sharp object near your eye then I think that's awesome too. Do what you're comfortable with!
7. Online displays of affection (or rejection)
Stop making your relationships and break ups public. I am guilty of this by all means. Being Facebook official and changing our Instagram bios really shouldn't mean as much as they do. The rest of the world doesn't care that Jimmy bought you flowers and took you fishing. And when things get bad we feel the need to let the whole world know how awful the other person is. News flash: 99% of your Facebook friends don't care and are rolling their eyes at you. We understand you're so happy in love or extremely hurt and upset, but we have our own issues to deal with.
8. College and career decisions
There is nothing wrong with going to a community college. There is nothing wrong with living at home. Life doesn't work out the way we want it to. Just because some of us don't get finical aid or have parents who make enough to pay for an ivy league school doesn't mean we are any less intelligent than you. Stop judging your peers choices in education or careers. I could be taking summer school classes or getting an internship in June. But I will be standing on a kayak doing the hokey pokey with a group of 8 year olds and it will be amazing! That doesn't make me any less dedicated than you. It's a different kind of dedication and commitment that will give me a different kind of advantage that a classroom can't give me.
This is just a short list of things we're all terrible at. I'm making a promise to myself right now to the entire internet to not do any of these things/let the judgement of them get to me. We need to take a better look at how these things are hurting the people around us and try to be better human beings when it comes to our friends.
Will you try harder too?
Much love,
Jen
"Oh my god all she does is post selfies" is such a stupid thing my generation complains about. So what if Sally posts pictures of herself? I post selfies on my Instagram because that morning I was just really feeling great about myself. I don't post them for likes or to receive compliments. I do it because I look at my phone and think "wow I look very nice today' and that makes me feel good! So girls out there, you post as many selfies as you like! And if someone doesn't like it then the unfollow button is really easy to find.
6. Makeup
It's shocking to me how many comments about girls wearing make up I find men posting on Facebook. We are either fake because we wear too much, or some of my male "friends" have commented on how ugly girls can look underneath the make up. Because of this girls are posting pictures with captions screaming "look at me I'm brave enough to not wear make up online!!!!". I have pictures on my Instagram without make up on, but you all probably don't know that because it really isn't that big of a deal. I wear make up because I like to. I like how when I spend some time on it I can sort of almost look my age. So if you like wearing a ton of make up then go for it!!! And if you don't even want to consider the idea of putting a sharp object near your eye then I think that's awesome too. Do what you're comfortable with!
7. Online displays of affection (or rejection)
Stop making your relationships and break ups public. I am guilty of this by all means. Being Facebook official and changing our Instagram bios really shouldn't mean as much as they do. The rest of the world doesn't care that Jimmy bought you flowers and took you fishing. And when things get bad we feel the need to let the whole world know how awful the other person is. News flash: 99% of your Facebook friends don't care and are rolling their eyes at you. We understand you're so happy in love or extremely hurt and upset, but we have our own issues to deal with.
8. College and career decisions
There is nothing wrong with going to a community college. There is nothing wrong with living at home. Life doesn't work out the way we want it to. Just because some of us don't get finical aid or have parents who make enough to pay for an ivy league school doesn't mean we are any less intelligent than you. Stop judging your peers choices in education or careers. I could be taking summer school classes or getting an internship in June. But I will be standing on a kayak doing the hokey pokey with a group of 8 year olds and it will be amazing! That doesn't make me any less dedicated than you. It's a different kind of dedication and commitment that will give me a different kind of advantage that a classroom can't give me.
This is just a short list of things we're all terrible at. I'm making a promise to myself right now to the entire internet to not do any of these things/let the judgement of them get to me. We need to take a better look at how these things are hurting the people around us and try to be better human beings when it comes to our friends.
Will you try harder too?
Much love,
Jen
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